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Saturday, August 27, 2011

No I am not having a good experience

Way to many times I read or heard that a mastectomy doesn't hurt that bad.
So before surgery I was hopeful....
Two weeks out of this I have to wonder who are they trying to fool.
While I know every mastectomy is different and everyone's pain tolerance is different
And I have a very high pain tolerance.
THIS HURTS.....Hurts Bad !!!

I've given birth to three out of my four children without meds.
I've had a 10 hour spinal fusion surgery, where they cut all the way down my back and a 12" incision out of my butt cheek to get bone off my pelvis to fuse to my spine.
Spending 3 months in a body cast afterwards.
I've had hernia and others surgeries ,and healed very quickly.

So I am not new to surgery or living with chronic back pain that needs more surgery.

I had to quit posting on a forum I found for breast cancer because I didn't want to scare the ladies who still had upcoming surgery.
Kinda like your Mother use to say "What you don't know , won't hurt you" kinda thing.
And there's also the one gal who is making a double mastectomy sound like its "easy peasy"

I don't know WHAT type of double mastectomy she had....
But perhaps it didn't involve a 3 cm tumor in your chest wall,
Where your surgeon tried to get it all but didn't.
And now you still have to have more deeper surgery and skin drafts because it's also in your skin.

She wrote how she needed nothing for pain...went shopping..
out to eat and even told about how she was back to walking a mile 3 days after.

It made me feel like a baby....and my thoughts were how about all the other women who've just had surgery and are in terrible pain?
How did that make them feel???

She even said after many posts from others.
"Am the only one who's had a good experience?
Hello?!?!?!?!? HOW in the world can a double or even single mastectomy be
a "good experience" ????
I was just in shock she would post such a thing.
I know how I felt when I read this...and can only imagine how it made others feel.

Maybe she thought she was being uplifting?
I just don't know....
But it hurts....I don't know what I would have done without my Mom
who talked and cried with me the other morning when the pain got away from me overnight as I slept thru when I should have taken a pain pill.

I was sobbing and dry heaving from the pain.
I was not nauseated at all....
It was just the pain. Mom talked to me while I cried and waited for the pain pill to kick in..

So no....
I am NOT having a "good experience"

But I am strong...And my faith in God is even stronger
Others who know me know how strong I am.
I can do this~~


  1. I know how strong you are!! Blogging through out your experience is a testament to your strength!! As far as that other blogger makes you wonder...maybe they had a lumpectomy and they are confused? or a troll sick as it is..there is no shame in pain!! and no shame in wanting your Mama to make it all better!! Thats what Mamas do :) Love you keep fighting keep being the strong woman we all know you are!!

  2. I am 4 (almost 5) weeks out from my double masectomy/tissue expanders and am still taking some pain meds. Maybe only a couple a in the afternoon and one at night to sleep. It will get better! But I've learned after several surgeries that they don't give out medals for tolerating the pain in place of the meds! I'm not in great pain, but the tissue expanders are behind my muscle stretching it and I feel like I have a huge rubber band stretched across my chest area and under my arms as tightly as it can be stretched! So, there is definately some discomfort that the pain pills help. Hang in will get better! I'm eager for the day I don't even "feel" my chest area. Hugs!

  3. I can't imagine why that woman would post those things, but I was by my Mothers side every step of the way through her mastectomy. And I know it is excruciating pain. All I can say is she must have eaten pain pills like they were candy. She really shouldn't have posted that. But maybe she really did have good intentions. (Let's hope so).So just take those pain pills like you're supposed to before the pain gets too bad and the pain gets away from you. I know your mom and she wouldn't want to be anywhere but by your side. It's ok to lean on her. She will always be on one side to help you through this and God is on the other. So either way you have to lean you're in the best arms you can ever be in. I pray daily that God will ease your pain and give you the strength to get through this. I read all of your posts and this blog and you are truly amazing.You have such a wonderful attitude. You will make it through all of this. Love, Aunt Linda

  4. @Jen
    I hope that I added the code for this reply thing correctly :)
    Yes...I guess thats what Mama's are for...but I sure felt awful starting off her day that way.
    I can't imagine how hard it is for her.
    I would rather go thru this , then have to see one of my kids go thru it. Thats all I know.
    Love you so much !

  5. @Cindy Galbraith
    I did not have reconstrution started Cindy.
    I had heard that did make the BMX really painful.
    You're so right...they don't give out they?
    I just really worried about what the others gals felt like when they too were hurting .
    I looked to see if you have a blog or Email addy and didnt see anything. So will write you this way. ((((hugs)))) and love to a sister in this fight.

  6. A Linda...
    I remembered your Mom died of cancer but I didnt remember it was breast cancer.
    I pray for the cure so our daughters and grand-daughters never have to go thru what your Mom and so many others did
    ((((hugs)))) and love you for checking in to see how I'm doing and most of all praying for me

  7. BMX hurts. And all the women I know of who have had their implant exchanges say afterwards, "Thank God it wasn't as painful as the BMX!" Ignore the lone wolf who thinks a BMX is a walk in the park. Remember, you had more traumatic surgery because your tumor was in your chest wall. Hell yeah, that hurts! Please, please, please don't give that easy peasy another thought! She is in a singular minority.

    Wishing you good sleep, plentiful pain pills and your family close by. [[[gentle cyber hugs]]]

  8. I can not even imagine the pain. Please ignore the silly people implying that it should be simple. Take your time with healing and remember that you are constantly in the thoughts and prayers of many. You ARE strong and you will get through this.

  9. Debbi...
    Sorry to hear that this has been so very tough... :( Praying for you

  10. Debbi,
    I've been watching your posts, and I admire you SO MUCH! I've not had cancer surgery, but have had a kidney removed. You are right about the deep pain being from the removal of the growth from the chest wall. That takes the recovery to a whole different level. Set an alarm on your cell phone or whatever you have to do to avoid missing a pain pill. Getting behind is SO difficult to recover from.

  11. I had my BMX, last Oct, it was no walk in the park. I also had expanders inserted at the same time, they are also uncomfortable. If I can give you any advice it would be to give yourself time and take all the help you can get (I couldn't even dress myself without help for two weeks) What you are dealing with is normal, that one gal who said this was easy is the exception. Take care

  12. So sorry your recovery from surgery is so difficult. It is true that everyone heals differently. And I think everyone has different experiences themselves. I have been through surgery where I didn't heal quickly at all. And then I had my lumpectomy and lymph nodes removed this summer and it was a piece of cake. Seriously. I guess it all depends -- I'm just not sure on what.

    Anyway - hang in there. I was also told there would be no cancer in my lymph nodes. WRONG. It never showed up on the MRIs. Scary. I am just glad they found it and got it out of me!

    Sending you healing energy --



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